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Queen's Vanity

#Precision…

The Reason

I wish I could sing you a goodnight song.
To ease your mind from the daily parade.
There never was worthy to be held on for long.
But you were someone I could never evade.
Now the reason is one I can’t begin to explain.
The reason for which I had to desert you on the plane

The night we looked up in the sky full of stars,
We wondered what it would be like to go up that far.
But then I turned my face to drown in your eyes,
To only see the reflection of a man, a monster I despise.
So I filled up my hands with the gravel or sand,
To throw at his face and escape the lonely island.

But did I hurl that piece of earth in my hand, to dismantle his face?
So many nights I wondered, “I must have to buy us the chase.”
As I lifted my hand and aimed  at that man,
You were the one to make me quit, Mccahan.
All my might with which I crashed,
Looking at the deceit inside of me that you had cast.

Oh, you little trickster! You had me trapped.
But only trapped and no scare by the game you had mapped.
You sold me to a maiden of a rich handicapped.
Unlike you, he had a heart allowing me and I dashed.

That night I stole to solely survive.
No glimmer, no glitter only sadness revived.
That same night an angel, walked up to me and smiled.

“Beware sweet soul, for this world won’t let you thrive.”
“But now I don’t care for a silver or a dime.”

“Ask me for one and I’ll grant you a wish.”
“Grant me Mccahan so that I can be the cause of his diminish.”

“Be careful little one, a day comes when everyone pays for their deed.”
“Don’t worry, blessed soul, for even the consequences make me desire to watch him bleed.”

Our paths met again and I bet that you had changed.
You fell for me, for which was something I had always craved.
We checked in to the airport and then boarded the traveller’s crate.
And this time, to shatter you to pieces a little bigger than your lies, was the reason for which I had left you on that plane.

For those of you reading this, may think of me as a swollen heart.
But no, I consisted of rather a revengeful heart.
Not only was he abandoned by his love, but had crashed along with the plane.
The plane crash to which I was warned by the angel in one dream full of pain.

~Pragya Sachdeva

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Life So Called.

In the end, after all the discussion, debates,  controversies, philosophies, to what conclusion do we reach. After infinity, what is life? A question the wise have been trying to answer since forever. Many a time, they were correct but their theories could always be contradicted. So, they weren’t or couldn’t be of much use. They didn’t satisfy the hunger this question starves us with. And why do we inquire ourselves with this question yet everyday. Why do we need to comprehend it to limits, where we’re saturated to even remember where we started. We’re living it everyday. What more could be explained?
And now, I, too, will give a mere try to explain this mayhem.
It’s simple. You wake up and think. You start imagining. The moment those eyes open up and see the first light, without a second wasted, a thought comes up. It could be about anything. But we think those things. That determine what will be the event next. Or perhaps in the long term, the concentration of the fast paced thoughts will create what occurs in our life then. Millions of people, leading different lives, think and work. Each one of them is facing a dissimilar situation that has only been implented by their own thoughts. They go through the day. Everyone, with a time limit of twenty-four hours, continues to breathe and create emotions. Those emotions only a foundation of this ongoing wheel right now. In reality, each and every event is created by us.
Yes, we live with a plenty of people around. But they are only mere milestones in our wheel of worlds. We are on this road alone. Rest is an animation of what we made it to be. Because, even the close and loved ones have only become so by our thoughts. We did things with them, we spent numerous moments together, which gave way to thoughts and then to emotions and then to what we have in our hands today. Each and every thing we feel, see, touch is a product of the thoughts we let on our minds. Which is uncontrollable. Thoughts will flow. All the time. Or the brain is dead. This world is a mechanism of what we made it to be. Hence, the reason, we evoluted.
Right now, when you stop to question your existence, you won’t find the answer. There exists no answer. We don’t know how we got produced. How ARE we to know who made us. Thus, we make believe in God and there, out there, people like us, keep questioning and so many turn into atheists for the same reason. We confuse ourselves, complicating  things. The reason remains the same. Thoughts.
These are just mind patterns. This mind, has abilities so far stretched, you can’t see it even after the horizon. It’s true, everything, every damn thing is a simple possibility. May it be emotional or physical. If we allow ourselves full openness, we can discover what we can do with the same hands and legs we were born with. And it’s magical. But somehow, some corrupted minds sat the foundation of the evolution we’re continuing today. For what is there politics? For want are there terrorists? For what do we what to become successful that means money? What do we achieve? Nothing. This means nothing. It means a lot but to this mind of ours which we have convinced to believe that way. So it does. It follows the commands of the sailor. We gave these insubstantial things the value. The value, again created by us. By our thoughts.
All this again, is a mind game. You really can achieve  anything! If you convince your brain to believe you can. And one of the simplest methods people adopt who have achieved what they wanted was to make pretend. Pretend you already have what you want and in a matter of time you are gifted it by the forces of nature. Again, a very important feature of this world. This brain is the commander and the forces of nature are it’s commander’s followers. They execute the orders implemented by us. Or the thoughts we allowed. We, a matter of existence that supports this mechanism, it’s workings.
And there is so much more! After this life, beyond this universe. In physical entity or of the mind. In both, it exists. It will be discovered some day. And the discoveries made will again would have been put there by the implementation and execution of our thoughts. The reality in the end is, the world operates on thoughts. The body is a medium to operate accordingly. The body, no doubt could change, if the thoughts do. And unimaginable abilities can be carried out if we believed. See through closed eyes? Walk parallel the force of gravity? Fly without wings? Or grow wings? All is possible. In real sense and not just metamorphically. Life is this. The now. What we create each second. How we operate. The everyday. The single day in it’s counting. But the mechanism is complex and complications is what we beings don’t prefer, so we made this world the way it is. With small yet utterless and meaningless entities to satisfy and keep our brain so powerful occupied and die without even realizing it’s full potention, because maybe we’re afraid of the many possibilities and utterances. In the end, we fool our minds to think happiness is the ultimate salvation and it’s many variants. There is no such thing. Only a creation of the thoughts. It’s a process of fluids inside our body, again. Hormones, endorphins and what all consists in the dictionary of a subject we created named biology. And how rhetorical that sounds with the mentioning of it. This life is a game. Without rules and only extremities. And this is not the end. This life what we think it to be is not just it. We don’t get born and die and the end. No. The end is not there. Everything does come to an end. But is followed by something anew. So it never really ends. What we don’t know is what lies after our such perceived deaths. The universe is beyond our imagination. Then we come to a point where finally out thoughts take a break. Then is a world we have not been made aware of. So we don’t decide. But death is not an end of this dubiety. We’ll keep moving on. One can say, this life is a vacation from the real world or maybe a dream so long we don’t remember the real thing. Because who knows? This could all be a product of our humour. It is a creation of our thought, now could it be a dream too, that is also a creation of our thoughts again. Are we living in a dream? Out if which we only come out once we die. Was all this a big joke? The answers just don’t exist.

~Pragya Sachdeva

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Machines

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Aren’t we all just machines? Indeed we are. Just like one, we’re only carrying out the commands that have been handed to us by someone or the other. One today doesn’t seem to possess a free will or perhaps is restricted from pursuing it. One would say for those who hang themselves with a rope around their neck dangling from the roof or for those who elope are only not much than imbeciles, without considering the brokenness culminated in those homo sapiens that triggered this outcome.

We, who have been baptised mortal beings and again I wouldn’t refer “we” as “human beings” for we’re far from that entitlement, have moulded this game under our influences. Calling ourselves the chief thespian, we try and force things to be in our control while overlooking the minds crushed in the continuing events. Those we overlook lose the power and run out of lives falling off the cliff. And while we can offer them bonus lives, we stand beholding with the eyes of a critic, “What an oaf!”

The irony, however, securely rests in the fact that while these state of affairs kept occurring, pushing them off the edge, our greed didn’t shrink. We kept gathering the perks to grow and to keep moving leaving behind none for the imbeciles as one says.

This was all good; this was what was branded moral by the society. As long as one follows the script, it’s all fun and games until one decides to take their own stand only to be beaten down by the beliefs a majority held.

Power is the word. This is what they have been trying to protect like their biological offspring. The delicate ego rests all comfortably in that word. This shan’t be harmed but only harnessed more and more until they ultimately rupture. At the end of the day, if this is not protected then rather a lot are in jeopardy. So the imbeciles protect it and reside to yield the death route.

For all I know, those oafs aren’t barbarians and the hand of basic courtesy can be extended towards them. They don’t make the bridge for one to land their feet on them. The dominant do not govern this game. Or have they become the boss of the bullet hell?


~Pragya Sachdeva

 

2015

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2015, one of the most adventurous years of my life though I’m only 15 years vintage. Like any other, I too learned a few too many bittersweet truths of existence.
I started on a shaky road enroute abhorrent experiences reaching not the destination but again milestones so many.
One of them would be the realization of something at the absence of name. It is us. The world. The universe. And furthermore that lies but maybe not. The partitions we have created whose vacancy could only provide us with the whole. But no. Millions of mind can’t lose fictitious balance only to result in imbalance. So the few of us do the part.
They said nothing is impossible. I believed the world is nothing. If it was, what was it? Hence, I was convinced, rather, nothing really is a possibility as it is the only utterance. We’re all for what? Nothing. Repetitions. Yes, progress will take place, giving birth to new, always has, but, at the end, who knows if the fairy tales taught us the truth or only hid it to say it ain’t an ending if it’s not happy. We don’t know. So we do what seems to us near sane.
Which brings me to the next lesson of this year, when you can’t say what’s sane but you do because you believe it is, so can I call insanity the right doing because I believe.
People told me I’m like the zombie of class. They had assumed me different, the insane one but to reverse the imagery, I see they being called the odd ones in a bunch of zombie alikes. It’s all a matter of perception. How you perceive it is how it is because the one who differed between sane and insane hadn’t himself known the edge between the two whereas we fall in it. Believing what’s been believed.
For me, do the insane. If we can’t comprehend what we’re doing. Explore. Take real risks. Make your heart beat where you might feel unsure of liveliness.
What’s supposed to happen will happen. So do what you wouldn’t do. Life, so called will change giving you wings to fly out of where you fell. When our creator never told us what’s right or wrong, we’re not to decide and believe the stupid beliefs that have been carried on for long.
Make your own decisions. What others say is only a product of the things they’ve been told and what they chose to accept.
On to number three. Yes, life has ups and downs. And to think, it’s all oblivion. So either die living in chaos of options or.., actually there really isn’t anything further that. It’s only a chaos on looking closely.
But,
.
.
.
To be continued.


~Pragya Sachdeva

 

The Beyond (Warning – Sad&Negative)

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We, as human beings live in a small world. The same sounds, the same imagery. Meeting the same people later after time. All goes around and you can see it coming back. Someone’s progression, someone’s downfall. Bringing your hopes up high and later facing disappointment. Crying and laughing. Nothing’s new. It’s all the same small world.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? For me, I can’t imagine. But we all know the possibilities. As if nothing’s possible, we know all the possibilities. Procrastinating …already? It’s weird. You’re dillusional. But again nothing really makes any sense. I mean, why were we even born? Why was the human race created? To keep God’s company? And what is “God”? Just a name we have given ourselves because were not ready for the ultimate truth yet? Or even is there any? We have placed ourselves with so many boundaries. Are we so scared to see what really lies beyond? Mixing ourselves in things like money, prosperity etc. And think we stand above. So small is our world. Thinking to live lives like ” normal” people doing “everyday” things. Purest boundaries. So meaningless. Such meaningless is the world. “Should I wear this or that? My God! I have no clothes.” To think, does it really matter to the universe in which birth and death seems to prevail what you’re going to wear. But then again, does anything really matter? Yes it does.

What does? I’m not aware and neither is anyone else because we haven’t discovered that yet. Though, the answers you know. But you haven’t dug it out your brain. For the maximum part of the brain is left untouched and for the record, not literally.
To say, we only do what has been done before. And progress in the wrong track for that one won’t lead no one to what our true beings are looking for. The beyond.

BEAUTY

Swim deep into the earth where you find the fire that freezes you, then slowly turn into vapour so that you rise above and touch the sunlight to form a rainbow. Bring a smile on someone’s face. Cheers to someone’s eyes. Be beautiful.

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THE SUSPENSE

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Have you ever wondered what the birds see when they fly, when a tree falls in the woods, does it really make a noise. When no one’s watching, does the projection remain or is this all a quantum of time?

What happens to yesterday, where does future travel? Perhaps, we were never at rest, now that we know that it is time that travels. Along with which we ride, we eventually subside.

It is only the laws of nature that we always discover. One correlating with variants and one contradicting the others.

Are you surprised to see the answers we have yet to revelate? If yes, then don’t be, this was only a teaser till date.


 

~Pragya Sachdeva

In Search Of Inspiration

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Stargazing betwixt the night, somewhere vers the stars, I searched for inspiration but couldn’t find any. Nothing was turning me on lately. The willingness in me to do something had run out of gas. Like an old, useless sack lying on the couch all day, all night was how I had started picturing myself. Aspirations I had so many but no energy to work towards them.

So, there I was focusing on that single star which I presumed to be modifying its position. With more concentration I was sure of it. Curiosity forcing me to and I brought up a telescope to examine what I could. That tingling feeling I was having procrastinating myself, like I had just discovered something brilliant. But . . . no! It couldn’t have been. There was something up in the wild blue yonder but I blamed my telescope for having faults. Little did I know, I wasn’t the only one inspecting something.

Maybe, was it an intuition? I don’t know, but it felt like what I was considering a self-moving star was gawking at me, or shall I say, right through me. Was there something behind me? That couldn’t have been! Everyone was asleep. So, following the incline gaze, I reached to the bottom end. Then there was no descending further. Gathering few equipment after, I commenced digging up what I was counting on to be mystery. How bizarre! Midnight digging! But contradicting the fact of me building a cavity in the earth were the butterflies tickling my nerves of the suspense that lied beneath the crust. Voila! I thought. Standing before conceivably wings, wings of a . . I hadn’t discovered that yet. My attempt to touch them

made them sparkle. Donc, perhaps a reality check would disencumber the perplexity that was concocted in my head ­­- At the lifeline of a monotonous cycle, at precisely 12:36 a.m. ( Thanks to my watch ), feet cemented to the floor, anterior to those wings that glimmered at human touch. That night took me by a storm with that weird yet mind-boggling ‘something yet undefined’.

~Pragya Sachdeva

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#Fluctuations

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Since it was almost time for him to leave, she decided to let go. After much of lingering, attempts so many, care from his heart never touched her soul. A series of fluctuations steered their wheel. Fluctuations of fire and burnt coal. The whole enchilada leading to the ultimate culmination. The elopement of yet another story.
~Pragya Sachdeva

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